Tuesday, June 30, 2009


Yeah, that's pretty much how I feel. I know I haven't posted for awhile but it's for the very reason that I feel like absolute and utter crap and I've felt like that for quite a while now.

Looking up my symptoms, it could be anything from blood pressure to diabetes. I went in for blood tests yesterday and hopefully it will be something that I can remedy easily.

After conversing with my doctor he says that besides having to lose weight it shouldn't be anything serious. Well, considering that quite a few young people I know are getting old people diseases is nothing new. It's not like they tested all what would happen from us ingesting all that growth hormone. Hopefully, our kiddies won't get the same raw deal that we did.

My friend Opposite George for instance, has kidney disease and she's the healthiest person I know. Never touches junk food or fizzy drinks. In fact, her doctors kept diagnosing her improperly because they just couldn't believe someone her age and in her health could be sick. Now she has to take medication for the rest of her life. I know other friends who have had everything from stress attacks to holes in their hearts. Even my good buddy Griz, who should by all accounts been healthy was struck down in his prime but thankfully he's bounced back.

I just gotta say. . .what the hell is going on?? I honestly don't think I should know of people my age getting sick with serious illnesses. I assure you it's not hubris about being young, the rules just don't seem to apply anymore. I expect to get struck in my 40's or 50's, certainly not in my 20's and 30's. That seems to be the trend though.

Well, there's a crapload more I could say about that but I'm already feeling light-headed again.

Still feeling sad about MJ. I guess because it looks like nobody honoured him properly. That BET tribute sucked. I wasn't the greatest fan. Around the 90's though I just got struck with Mike fever and went out and bought all his anthology cd's and of course Thriller. I was kinda ticked off that I had to buy thriller because it cost me $27.00 which I thought was kinda high for a cd that came out when I was born but I bought it anyways. Well, what can I say. . . that cd was worth it.

Here is one person's opinion, it's pretty long but I have to agree with his points. Whether you liked him or not, the man changed music. He was and always be an ICON. Highlighted if you're a tl;dr type of person.

Over the past week many of us have sat in seething anger as news show after news show and pundit after pundit have been granted large platforms and an abundance of air time to come and trash Michael Jackson. I’m not talking about raising a couple of controversial issues here and there, but some of the folks who have been dragged out the sewer with the express purpose of going all out not to just smash on MJ, but to do so in such away that it would hurt us. It was like some diabolical mind sat in a room and said ‘Here’s how you can really totally demoralize Black folks-take the biggest icon and treat him like shit while the body is still warm’ Watching the coverage of Michael Jackson on many of these mainstream news outlets has me wondering if MJ did something personal to some of them.
Simply put, OJ Simpson got and gets better treatment.

Now if it was just a Michael thing most of us wouldn’t care. Most of us would keep it moving and call it a day, but MJ’s music was the soundtrack for so many people around the world and for a variety of generations from the late 60s up to the 90s and beyond. Jackson’s videos, music, concerts all had deep meaning-and because of that we hoped that the criticism would be toned down and the hatred would be put away for another day.

I’m old enough to remember when Beatles’s legend John Lennon was shot and I don’t recall such hatred and long winded conversations about his drug use or anything like that. Right wing nutcases who found him to be this anti-war subversive figure dialed down their rhetoric and Lennon was allowed to be seen as this popular worldwide icon who impacted the lives of a generation of Baby Boomers. People understood with the passing of Lennon was the passing of an important era for millions of people and so his memory was treated with respect and dignity.

When Elvis Presley the King of Rock died, even though he was a drug abuser and about 300 pounds over weight LOL at the time of his death, the tributes paid to him were stupendous. He was seen as royalty and people rightfully recognized that his persona and music meant a lot to a grieving nation. People dialed back the critiques. The Elvis who symbolized an era and exemplified several generations of music lovers was much bigger then the Elvis who one could trash all day and so space to properly grieve was created.

No such respect has been given to Michael Joseph Jackson. And too be honest in today’s climate of ‘gotcha’ media one shouldn’t be surprised. We shouldn’t be shocked but for many the hurt is there and damage done. Its hard to avoid. There are many commentators and pundits who I will never respect again because they went there and gave no room for a nation to grieve and reflect on the meaning of man who meant so much to so so many over the past 3 decades. As I said earlier, these folks seemed to be a part of a much larger game plan where psychological warfare is at play.
Enter BET-Black Entertainment Television.

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Last night (Sunday June 28th) , all eyes turned to the Viacom owned music TV network as many of us perhaps naively hoped that those running the ship would use their platforms and immense reach to correct the wrongs we saw within the mainstream. After all, Michael Jackson helped put Viacom (MTV) on the map. I just knew CEO Sumner Redstone would see to it that one of his properties which has become the worldwide symbol for pop culture and music would ‘do this right’. All of wondered what sort of surprise Viacom/ BET would put forth.

Leading up to last night’s event the rumors were circulating. We heard Chris Brown was going to do a tribute with Usher as part of his comeback. We heard Justin Timberlake was coming in to do a special routine. We heard Beyonce had changed her routine around. We heard some of the Jacksons themselves were going to be there. (We later saw father Joe Jackson and sister Janet Jackson who left us in tears when she finally took the stage) The word was BET was gonna deliver and deliver big and deliver like only BET can.

We already knew BET was scheduled to pay tribute to the O Jays and so one figured they were already in the zone. Perhaps the O Jays themselves would set the tone having known MJ and coming from that important era in our history where music and social causes all merged together. Who better then the O Jays to say a few words and put a grieving nation at ease. We figured some icons from the Motown era would be on hand last night to say a few words-Diana Ross, Barry Gordy, Quincy Jones, Gladys Knight, Stevie Wonder, Harry Belafonte, Smokey Robinson etc would maybe come on board-not to perform, but to offer up their own insights and share in the tribute/ celebration for Michael Jackson. And if they couldn’t show up in person because everything was so sudden and so last minute then Viacom with its worldwide reach and set ups in every country on planet Earth could’ve sent a camera crew to Timbuktu if needed and get some insightful words from the aforementioned and beyond.

We thought every record industry executive from Clive Davis to Tommy Motolato the people who run the Grammies to Bono from U2 on down would’ve been on hand to say a few words and talk about how Michael Jackson saved their industry. We thought we would’ve heard more about the charities he so generously gave to over the years so folks would better understand that he was more than the white glove and moon walk.

We figured there’d be pictures, vintage footage and a somber moment of silence for Michael Jackson. Did we have a moment of silence last night- I may have missed it? All I know is we wanted more for our ‘King’. This was our true king when it came to pop culture and music. As I mentioned so many of us were grieving, so many of us felt like we were being assaulted, so we really looked to BET- Black Entertainment Television to rise to the occasion in ways we had never imagined.

Michael Jackson was not some beefing rapper from the streets who got shot over some petty nonsense. He wasn’t having a war of words with 50 Cent, Rick Ross, Suge Knight or some other artist. He wasn’t some Johnny come lately who had one or two hit songs and that’s it. He was Michael Jackson-worldwide icon and when he died in spite of controversary or what me and you may have thought about him, the music world needed to stop. All the stops needed to be pulled out. When John Lennon died the world stopped. It came to a halt. I was in school and we suspended our lessons to talk about John Lennon. When Elvis died the world stopped. All hands were on deck. People cancelled whatever they were doing and they flew to where ever they needed to go to to pay homage. When 2Pac and Notorious BIG died the music world stopped. We suspended our programming on the radio station for two days as family friends and whoever flew in to honor them.

My point in referencing that scenario is that with the death of Michael Jackson and all eyes on the BET Awards show owned by the biggest music network in the world and one of the biggest media companies in the world, this should’ve damn well expanded beyond BET. The call should’ve went out; ‘Stop what your doing-All hands on deck… the King of Pop died and proper tributes must be paid. If the show goes over an hour so be it. If Lil Wayne and Drake can’t change up at the last minute and use their incredible talents to do something more fitting versuses the profanity laced bs routine they did last night about wanting to screw every girl in the world and have what appeared to be 12 year old girls on stage-then its time for them to fall the hell back. Save that nonsense for another date and time. Alicia Keyes kept mentioning the spirit in the room was enthralling and that everyone was feeling Michael’s presence. It was hard to tell on TV. We wanted more than a shout out to MJ after each song was sung. We wanted more, needed more, expected more from a network so powerful.

We understand people didn’t have time to prepare and hone things to perfection. We understand that that it was last minute, but the rule of thumb in show business has always been when in over your head keep it simple. Where was the film montage like they did for the O Jays? To be honest that was all that was really needed. Imagine if we were treated to a 15 minute film montage and then Janet came out to speak followed by Jamie Foxx andNeyo singing? That would’ve been butter- pure butter. Imagine if this was done with a nice set up away from the regularly scheduled routines which at times seemed mediocre and totally in approapraite if MJ was being honored?

A Few things to Ponder….

Just sad.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Rest In Peace Michael

Wow, I was pretty shocked to hear about that death! Regardless of the man's very complicated life he was an ICON. You could probably go to the poorest village in the middle of nowhere and say his name and they'd know exactly who he was.

And honestly, the guy was immensely talented. If he didn't have the talent he did the barriers that existed in his day would not have been broken.

Rest in Peace, Michael Jackson 1958-2009

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Father's Day Post

Well, I might complain about Dr. Evil an awful lot but my job would be a hell of a lot harder if he wasn't around.

Got up this morning and since I didn't have groceries to do a big breakfast I settled with honey oatmeal, some cut-up apple and a mug of tea. I made Thing One and Two carry it to him in bed. They shouted "Happy Father's Day" and gave him a big hug. One of the mushier family moments I've had o_O

So to you pops out there. . .

Ain't nothing you can say worse than "I'm a tell yo' daddy!"

This one right here is the BEST!! Somebody gonna get a hurt real bad. . .LMAO!!

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Back from Outer Space

Geez, without the internet I really felt like I was cut off from the world. I realized just how much I depend on it to keep in contact with folks and how out of touch I become. Also, I'm clearly not a phone person.

Well, due to my innernets shortage. . .it shall be awhile until I catch up on all my webcomics but I did get some stuff accomplished.

Finally got my G driver's licence. For those of you who didn't know this. . .who that would be is beyond me since like only three people read my blog :P . . .Ontario has the graduated licence system.

I failed the first test about three times before I passed and stunningly only took the second test (the highway test) once and passed!! I'm just so damned happy that I won't have to take another test and that my friggin' nightmares have finally ended. I was getting tired of dreaming of constantly crashing. I finally went back to my dreams of sex with celebrities. . .that's right, I normally dream about sex with celebrities.

I'm also working on getting a passport. I haven't had one in 8 years. I was planning a reasonable family vacation across the border but since the new rules have been implemented, looks like Dr. Evil and I will definitely need passports. I haven't been Stateside since I was about 16 so it will be exciting.

Thing One is healing up a lot better. Hopefully she'll be all the way there and I'll be able to take her swimming. I'm sure they're both getting tired of being cooped up.

I also noticed my lawn is about 4 feet overgrown. My very nice neighbour took care of my front lawn but I'll have to do the back. Good to be back?! HA!

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Everything is Everything

I just got off the phone with Opposite George. She listened to my funk and I listened to hers. Mostly hers revolve around being lonely and not being in a relationship. Mine, of course, revolves around everything else.
She reminded me not to be down and always encourages me to listen to the songs we used to listen to. I remember in one of my darker times this song lifted me up. As it does once again. . .

Everything is everything
What is meant to be, will be
After winter, must come spring
Change, it comes eventually

I wrote these words for everyone
Who struggles in their youth
Who won't accept deception
Instead of what is truth
It seems we lose the game,
Before we even start to play
Who made these rules? We're so confused
Easily led astray
Let me tell ya that
Everything is everything
Everything is everything
After winter, must come spring
Everything is everything

I philosophy
Possibly speak tongues
Beat drum, Abyssinian, street Baptist
Rap this in fine linen
From the beginning
My practice extending across the atlas
I begat this
Flippin' in the ghetto on a dirty mattress
You can't match this rapper / actress
More powerful than two Cleopatras
Bomb graffiti on the tomb of Nefertiti
MCs ain't ready to take it to the Serengeti
My rhymes is heavy like the mind of Sister Betty
L. Boogie spars with stars and constellations
Then came down for a little conversation
Adjacent to the king, fear no human being
Roll with cherubims to Nassau Coliseum
Now hear this mixture
Where hip hop meets scripture
Develop a negative into a positive picture

Now, everything is everything
What is meant to be, will be
After winter, must come spring
Change, it comes eventually

Sometimes it seems
We'll touch that dream
But things come slow or not at all
And the ones on top, won't make it stop
So convinced that they might fall
Let's love ourselves then we can't fail
To make a better situation
Tomorrow, our seeds will grow
All we need is dedication

Let me tell ya that,
Everything is everything
Everything is everything
After winter, must come spring
Everything is everything

Everything is everything
What is meant to be, will be
After winter, must come spring
Change, it comes eventually


Updatish post.

Well, let me start with my too much debt status. My lovely plans flew out the window as they are bound to do.

First with Thing One's bandages and medical stuff I've probably spent upwards of $500 on that so far and I'm still not done. Hopefully, she'll heal soon but you just can't plan for that sort of stuff.

Then there's the car and the $650 heart attack that Dr. Evil told me it would cost to repair. Again, just can't plan for that stuff. Mind you, that's probably just one of Dr. Evil's paycheques and the other one he gets will have to go to bills and mortgage. That leaves us with pretty much nothing.

My generous to a fault parents gave me $300 to help and some groceries which I thanked them immensely for. They also took Thing Two off my hand for a while so I won't have to worry about paying for her at least for the week. I'm also going to stay with them at the end of the week so that we can ease up on some of the spending.

I probably shouldn't have gone out but hey. . .even those of us who are megabroke need a break once in a while. I'm just sorry that Dr. Evil couldn't have also had something for himself. But then I think. . .wait a minute. . .he's the dingus who put us here in the first place!

He's been mostly good since January with the exception of two slip-ups. One where he bought STBD husband's groceries and I lost it on him. Asked him if he was out of his cotton pickin' mind to pick up groceries for someone who had a full-time job and was just lazy when it came to his finances. The fellow in question is no charity case and frankly, I don't consider him much of a friend either at this point. I can see why STBD is divorcing him.

The second time is because he went out to see an old friend and parked somewhere he shouldn't have and got a ticket but our friend (who is a true friend) payed for the ticket.

I told Dr. Evil to be wary at this time. We might not be doing well now but it wasn't always like this for us and it won't always be this way. We're at the 6 month mark of something that will last two years. I told him yeah. . .it seems like forever since we have a family and it feels like we're starting all over again but stay the course and we'll be better for it. I sincerely hope he takes my advice.

The next thing I have that's coming up and sort of ties in is my driving test. Still freaking me out. I'm having constant nightmares about it. In one of them I was in High School/College for some reason and I was late for an exam. You were and you were there trying to help me along with an assortment of people that I knew in Public School/High School/College. I have no idea where I am and I miss doing the exam or I do it and it's blank and I FAIL!

Yeah, pretty much always school-related. In another one I was actually doing the driving test and crashed head-on into multiple cars. As this has been going on for quite some time now I keep getting up in the middle of the night multiple times just wake up in a panic.

It's terrible, I haven't had a decent night's sleep in quite some time and I feel like I have no peace. Things just keep coming up and haunting me. I also have to pay for the lessons and the test so I'm nervous that I will have to take money from the Line of Credit again which I really don't want to do.

Yeah, I know how Bella Swan feels since I've been reading New Moon. Just panicky, sleepless, stressed and haunted of late. Just had to get it all off my chest.

Things will get better. . .I just have to believe that!

Tuesday, June 2, 2009


You can find the link here. . .but I just found this one so funny - I had to post it. Enjoy your laugh!

A friend of ours had banged this skankily hot girl and is telling us that she is a beast in the sack. We’re all hanging out at his house and he gets a call from her and she’s on her way over for another go. He has the nerve to try to usher us out but we’re having none of it. The guy was known for scrogging chicks left and right so it was pretty easy to persuade him into letting all 5 of us hide in different parts of his room while they bash leather.

We all did a great job of hiding because she wasn’t in the room 2 minutes before she was naked and gobbling his schlong.

1 guy was in the corner behind a curtain, 1 idiot got under the bed, my one friend gets under a huuuge pile of dirty clothes and his face was just kinda of sticking out (like a big dirty clothes jabba the hutt) and we were all chocking back laughter. Then me and and another friend have front row seats in his closet perfectly comfortable, standing up and looking right at their business on the bed in front of us.

Now, in retrospect, this whole thing wasn’t thought through properly. 5 immature doufouses (or is it doufi?) trying to go undetected when a girl is talking so dirty that the paint in the room was melting and young children in other towns probably started crying and nobody knew why. But we did. We’re all mustering every ounce within us to not bust out laughing.

She gets out from under him and repositions herself onto all fours to make some puppies and sticks her jiggly butt up and then it happened…

She busted a queef that would’ve calved glaciers. Unreal.

It proved too much… the strain was too great… no sooner did the queef stop than 3 of the 5 of us did that laughing sound that’s hard to spell. That same sound you make when you’re trying to choke down a bong hit. But we were strong enough to resist breaking out into full laughter… hands over mouth style.But, the gig was up…

Our buddy that was putting in the work kind of chuckled as she says “What the hell? Is someone else in here?!” She looks right at the crack in the closet door and says “Who’s in the god damn closet?!” Being the clown that I am and knowing that this was a nose dive we weren’t gonna be able to pull out of, I replied “Just us clothes.”

She started screaming and my wisecrack breaks the dam and the laughs come from everywhere as she scrambles into his bathroom. Surprisingly, afterwards she hung around and was totally cool.